Forever Teaser?

Forever Teaser?

A young man was sitting by the pond when a woman came and sat beside him. The long-haired woman with a white gown smiled at him and said "my dad and I used to come here to feed some fishes, as you are".
The man kept silent. He looked so depressed, his eyes staring into the void.
"Hey", the woman tilted her head. 
Sharply, he glanced at the woman and said "leave me alone!". 
The woman was shocked and said "what's the matter with you? if you have problems, just share it with me, not to me". 
Then, the man started talking. After telling all his problems, the man felt better. In short, they became friends.

Three times in a week, when the moon came and replaced the sun, they usually have a nice conversation by the pond and make a big laugh at everything. In one afternoon, the man came earlier than usual, his right hand was in his pocket. He glanced at his watch, it was 8.44 P.M. He thinks: "I will be lucky this time. I have spent my six-months-earnings for this, I will never regret everything I did for her". when the woman came he man held her hand, put the bracelet round her wrist, and said "I love you, would you be my complement?"

*****

10.45 P.M.- the young man in disbelief, thinks: "When I was sure that she will be with me, she said that she cannot. She said that I am too precious to be her boyfriend. She said that I have been her friend, and always will be. She said that she does not want to lose a figure of friend.

But why did she respond it? Why did she respond all what I do? Why did she take all what I give? Why did she let me get into the deep of her heart instead of signalize it since I was in the trespass? Why did she let me grasp a thorn-full rose and glance at me, bleeding?

I dare to bet all my life that she knew everything, she knew from the first time, but she kept watering the seed of my love until it bloomed and then blossom in her garden to be a white in the middle of reds. A little jasmine in a rose garden, but then there will be no jasmine any longer. My love started blooming when it is not needed, and dies when I need it the most".

*****

An old janitor was feeding the fishes in the pond. When he was about to sweep the dry leaves, he found a piece of paper was stuck in a branch of the tree. He opened it, it is written:

_____________________________________________________________

Yesterday, I hurt a man

He is so kind, perhaps the kindest person I met. He is one of the most meaningful people in my life. However, I cannot understand the reason why I do not love him. My heart belongs to a selfish, rude man who does not even care about me.

I do not love him, but I just cannot let him walk away my life. I need him, I need a white in the middle of my red garden.

Now, I am here with a misty eyes, thinking about him... 
thinking about the first time I met him... 
thinking about his ignorance that slowly turns into caring. 
perhaps, I had already known from the first time that he will fall in love with me... 
I had already guessed that his love will be one-sided, unrequited... 
I had already known that I would miss him... 
I will lose him.. 
Yet, I cannot...
________________________________________________________________

"Another broken-heart man!", The janitor put the paper into fire and said "rest in peace dear, your place is not here. Stop hurting men. I said that I was sorry, I always care about you, you ought to know that".

Short Story : Black and White

Black and White


A gold butterfly with broken wings and wet eyes finally found a shelter. His heart pounding rapidly. He thought: "I cannot understand, why they are so wicked. What have we done?". Suddenly, an old white parrot came, he looked like an angel.

"I am an old friend of your mom. Don't be frightened". The parrot came closer and asked "Where is your brother?". The butterfly did not know how to tell him. He just said "He is dead. We were playing with the other caterpillars in the farm when a giant came and took us. I don't understand why he took us. Is it because we are different? But why are we different?".

"Hmm... Let me tell you about your mother. She was a black caterpillar, at that time, black was associated with evil and witch. Nobody would get along with her simply because of the color. She was outcasted from the colony. In her solitary life in the middle of the forest, she found your dad, a black caterpillar, he was alienated too. In short, they felt in love to each other and decided to live together.

Day by day, they transformed into a black butterflies. Yet, they were not accepted in their colony when they tried to get back. They were insulted and assaulted by another butterflies, and they left with the flowing blood.

They did not know where to go. At that time, I suggested they go deep into the forest, because there were a crow colony, they might help them find some food. However, there were no flower there, the crows ate carcass, but they couldn't. They wanted to get out from that colony, but it was too dangerous in that forest. The only way to survive or at least for a longer life was being in that place.

Your parents did not accustom to eat carcass, in two days, they were weakening. It was in a rainy evening, your dad had been breathless when your mom was about to give you a birth. Suddenly, an old crow came and said that she would grant your mom's wish in exchange with her life.

I though your mom will ask your dad's life, but she did not. She wanted all of her children to be the most beautiful caterpillar, she wanted all her children to be birth in the farm and being loved by all the creatures".

The gold caterpillar with tears running down his cheeks looked into the void and laughingly said "My parents died because of being hated, and my brother died because of being loved. What an irony! "I just want to be normal, like the other."

The parrot came closer and said "be calm! you are not alone. You can stay in my place if you would".

The gold butterfly went mad and said "I would take a revenge of my parents' death, but... I have to..  disguise". He flew away and flagellated himself. The parrot tried to hinder him from doing that, but he was late.

"Now, I am no longer different... I am a red butterfly..." the gold butterfly said that as his last words.

*****

Some young butterflies - white, yellow,  red, blue, and... black butterflies- were flying happily by the flower garden with the old white parrot when suddenly a colony of butterflies assaulted him. The parrot would have been met his death if the young butterflies did not help him to escape. The colony of the butterfly was about to punish them when the king of butterfly came and set them free, then he asked the young butterflies to come to his place.

The king said "I was as big as you when that parrot came. At that time, he said that there were evil in our colony. He said that we should kill every black butterfly and alienated the black caterpillar before they transformed".

The young black butterfly nervously said "Don't kill me, I am not evil. I swear".

"Of course you are not. It just an old story. That is all not right. We realized that whatever our color is not connected with something bad. Don't judge a book by its cover.

Well, I will continue my story. At that time, We all believed what the parrot had said. We alienated two black caterpillars. When they had transformed into butterflies, and tried to come back in peace, we barbarically almost killed them. We were fooled. I heard that the butterflies were dead in the forest."

"We were sorry. We thought he was a good friend, because he looked like an angel", The young butterflies apologized. Then they asked the king "was that all the story of the parrot?"

"No!", the king answered it quickly "he is the only one in this forest who can talk to the giants. One day, we believed that he directed a giant to come here. The giant took something like a web. A few of us were caught, fortunately, most of us had successfully escaped by flying vertically, but I noticed 2 beautiful caterpillars were caught. I do not quite know what happened to them. Al I know, I can see clearly the giant went with the parrot in his left shoulder with an evil smiled.

I remember that several days ago, a canary came and said that both of the caterpillars were trapped in a strange place. The giant seemed to like them. He feed and took care of them. The giant was not bad, but her friend did. He asked the giant to kill the caterpillar".

*****

"John, look at this. I have said that you should not have allowed him to watch those kind of movies", said Mrs. Wright. "Why? what's the matter?" Mr. Wright answers. "take a look at this!", Mrs. Wright showed him a diary book. It is written:
_____________________________________________________________

Dear diary...

I cannot forget that incident. I was so bad. Yesterday, Mr. Brown taught us about Metamorphoses, and as an example, he used butterfly... yes butterfly, he said that butterfly is transformation of a caterpillar. The phases are Eggs - Caterpillar - Cocoon - Butterfly. If I knew it earlier, I would not have done that terrible things.

Last month, Abigor, my best friend told me that there are two gold caterpillar in the back of the school. After I cough them, I put them in two glass jars with plants inside. However, I felt strange in the next day, my caterpillars seemed to be trapped in a web. I did not know what to do. Suddenly, Abigor pushed me to help the caterpillar. Nervously, I took it and tore the web, but my lovely caterpillar was dead.

I cried all the night. The next day, Abigor woke me up. He said that a butterfly killed my only-left-caterpillar. I was in a rage, the butterfly was on the ceiling. I tried hard to get it, I took a pillow and threw at it. The butterfly felt, but suddenly it flew away through the window. Abigor assured me that it will die soon, because I broke his wings.

Now I realized that Abigor has changed. He becomes rude. I think he is an evil-hearted angel. He is the one who killed my fishes, cat, and maybe my little sister. I rushed to the kitchen, took a knife, but when I was about to stab him, I was too slow. He flew away through the window and laughingly said "Just wait! I will come back"
_____________________________________________________________

"She will be a good writer, she has the imagination. Anyway, it is almost impossible that Abigor can talk, he just copies what people said. Starting from now, I am the one who take care of Abigor. He is the only one I have after God took all of my family in that fire", Mr. Wright said as he caressed Abigor in his left shoulder.

An Encounter

I was in the central square in my hometown, doing the most boring thing, waiting. This place looks similar to what I was in several years ago, it is still with my ideals of the past. I could see myself running, playing football, playing basketball and doing some ridiculous things with my friends.

From the distance, I saw a young lady with a familiar face. She was in preparation to go home. I was trying to remember who she is, "Of course, she is my ex-girlfriend".

I called her and waved my hand. she stopped her motorcycle and pulled it over. With a frowning face, she came to me and smilingly asked me thousands of questions "Hananta? Is that you? Where have you been? How are you?".

"Hey hey, calm down. Don't be so hysteric. I'm fine. What are you doing here?"

"Haha... I have just played basketball, and you?"

"Visiting friends, but he is supposedly still in the bed, that is why I'm here. Are you in hurry?"

"Boys are lazy. No, I'm about to go there, buy some drink, come on, let's have some conversations"

"Okay" 

*****

We went to a juice stall in the corner of the central square. We sat in a long wooden seat. As she drank, she said "You looked different. What happened to you?"

"Do I? I don't know, perhaps some problems have shaped me to be a bit different person"

"Hmm... You do. May I ask you something?"

"Yeah, feel free to ask" I said.

"Why did you choose me? I mean, several years ago in school, there were many girls who were obviously more beautiful, richer, nicer, and taller than me"

"Haha cliche. When you slept, why do you wear  pajamas? Why don't you use clothes which are more expensive and more fashionable? It is not about better or what, it is just about fitted or not"

"You have changed to be a philosopher haha. If I were your 'pajamas', why did you leave me and find another girl?"

"Haha... There were so many philosopher in my class as if I took psychology or philosophy department in my university, I learn a lot from them. Anyway, that was because somebody had stolen my pajamas"

"Stolen?" She asked me.

"Yeah", at least, 'stolen' is a better diction rather than if I said 'My pajamas is used by somebody to sleep' right?"

"Okay, Now I know that you do change. You become a way more talk-active and smarter."

"You mean I did look goofy and geeky?"

"Haha, you know now"

"Shit! May I ask you something?"

"Yes of course"

"Do I look like a pervert?"

She looked a my face and laughed "Why do you ask me that question? Yes you do. Your eyes.. I mean, the way you look at somebody. it is too... I don't know how to describe it. Your stares 'undress' everyone you are staring at. You look at someone so deeply"

"Oh so that is right? Anyway, I will not concern about it. It will always be 'me' no matter how thousand people judge that I'm creepy or something. People will know me after they get to know me"

"Yes, but it will be a bit difficult for you to convince women right? They will feel bother and insecure"

"Yeah I know, but now, I do not pay more attention in searching any women. If my dream is looking for women, and it is what motivate me. Then, when I grasp my dream, things that will be happened to my life is just the void. I may look for more and more dreams to motivate me. It is endless"

With a very serious face, she said "Nice words, you have been more mature and wise"

"That is actually a quote, not my own words haha" I said.

Suddenly, my Phone rang. "It is my friend, he has finally got up. I have to go, but I won't ask your phone number. Just count on he fate, like today. I will be here in three months, a year, or longer. See you..."

Laughingly, she said "Haha I don't ask for your phone number either. Okay Mr. Philosopher, see you next time."

Now, I have proved that my past relationship would not always end up being like a stranger or even an enemy although my old love hardly blossom again.

A Lesson in High School

“Okay, it’s my new life, and I’m not going to spoil it again” I said, I went when the sun was in right on my head, so I asked my father to ride me to school. I was in the 1.9 class and my student number was 19, “it will be my lucky year” I thought. In class, I could only see a few familiar students, because they were my friends in Junior High school, and the rest were completely new people. I looked at every single student in my class and felt glad because there did not seem to be street-kid-face, besides, the girls were pretty, and this circumstances will surely motivate me to study hard.

I was a study-oriented student, what was I doing was just study to prove to my parents that I could get achievements in here, in their doubt. Moreover, I wanted to impress one of the girl I liked. My hard-work was not wasteful, my geography teacher pointed me to be my school’s representative to join the Olympiad. Several days later, my biology teacher asked me to join a biology competition as well.

I was overwhelmed with the materials and the supplementary books I should read in only several days. In one night, I realized that although I was academically a ‘successful’ student, I was not happy at all, I lost some parts of my youth. I began thinking of being like another students.

I had never been in a relationship with any girl in my life. I was so clumsy every time a girl come after me, I did not even dare to interact the girl I liked in the class, so that I decided to come and consult with one of my friends who is regarded as a playboy in my school to learn the ways how to attract girls.

“You have to change your appearance, the way you talk, the way you look at other people. It is quite difficult, but I am sure that you can”. He said and gave me a book about ways of attracting women. It seemed to me as if he was an angel who helped me from the darkness and despair.

After reading the book, I felt myself as Eros, a son of Aphrodite and Ares who could get every girls I wanted with a ‘new me’ who have changed. I started imagining myself dating with so many beautiful girls. Daydreaming for too long, I forgot to get ready for school, so I came late. The teachers I encountered at the corridor looked at me strangely with a frowning face and said “Hananta? Why do you look so different?”, but I just passed by. When I was in my class, fortunately there was no teacher. I felt every eyes in the class staring at me with my new appearance. I put my bag on the chair and went to the canteen with my friends. I felt free and happy, my life has changed and I had many friends who usually hanged up with me after school. Honestly, being with them made me forget about time, I went home at 8 or 9 P.M. if my parents asked me, I always said that I had just done a group assignment in my friend’s house.

I had already had everything that made me happy, except a girlfriend, so I planned to declare my feeling to a girl in my class who I liked since the first day. Because I did not have any experience, I just counted on the book my friend gave me. In the book, it was written if you wanted to declare your feeling, you should be brave, hold her hands, looked into her eyes, do not show any indication of doubt. After the school’s bell was ringing, smilingly I came to her and said “don’t go anywhere, I wanna said something” I tried to be elegant, but she said that she was in hurry and had to go home soon. Perhaps she had already known about my plan. Suddenly one of my friends said “what are you doing? Go after her, don’t let her go!” Then I ran after her as if the actors in the romance movie. 

“Hey, wait!”

She stopped “what’s the matter?”

Doing exactly as the book, I hold her hand, looked into her eyes, and said “would you be my girlfriend?”

“I do not know” she blushed and tried to leave me by pacing up. Because the book stated that I should be ‘nothing to lose’, I followed her until the front gate, there were many students and some of them are laughing at me.

“How? What is your answer?”

“I cannot answer it right now. It needs time, three days perhaps”

“I cannot wait for that long, I need your answer now! What is the difference between now and three days later?”

“I’m sorry, I can’t” she left me behind. I was speechless, I did not know what to do. However, finally I felt free from the chain that had tied me for 16 years. I felt happy.

I went home with a bow and smile. It was my first time declaring and being rejected at a very close time. Yet, I was happy.

After taking a bath, I thought of what had just happened an hour ago and I laughed. Suddenly, my phone rang, she texted me! It is written I’m sorry, I did not know what to do. There were so many people around. Actually, I wanted to say that it is wrong. I did not know whether I should be happy or what, but then I replied you should have said that an hour ago. There is no second chance in this life, and you have wasted it. After sending that message, I turned my phone off. I felt regret and sad, but it was my decision and I had to move on from her.

The first semester had passed. All of the students were gathered after the Monday ceremony. The headmaster announced the students who get the first, second, ant the third ranks for every classes. It made my heart pound because my class is the last which being announced. However I felt as if I won a lottery when the headmaster called out my name as the first rank and I got a trophy. I was so proud of myself. “I can get the achievement even though I have changed my living habits. I’ll do the same in the next semester and enjoy my life”.

In the next semester, I was becoming lazier. After school, I spent hours with my friends, touring, hanging out, and sometimes browsing and chatting in MIRC with as many as women as possible. I felt myself cool by doing those things. I went home at 9 or 10 P.M, glancing at the books, and sleeping.

I felt the materials in school were getting harder and I could not concentrate with them. I began ignoring several subjects and focusing on the pursuit of happiness.

After declaring my feeling for the first time, I felt like a bird which just escaped and flew away to places I have been deliriously wanted to be. I felt strange, I felt in love to every woman I found her interesting. In three weeks, I had dated many girls in many schools, and sometimes, I had to deal with problems, their boyfriends. Fortunately, I had many loyal friends who helped me to face that problems.

One day, my best friend came and said “you have changed. I missed my old friend” she put her hand in my shoulder “think about your parents, your dreams.” And she left.

In the evening, I was contemplating, and I found that I had been so unfair.

“I am consist of two men. One wants to have all the joy, passion, and adventures that life can give me. The other wants to be a slave to routine, to school life, to the things that can be planned and achieved. Both of us living in the same body and doing battle with each other” (quoted from Eleven Minutes, by Paulo Coelho)

I am in the middle of them, I have to be neutral. I should not have sided to one of them, because it will harm one part of me.

“I should learn about priority” I think.

The next day, I gave the book to my friend. “It is not the right time. I should learn about myself and the priority before learning about love and romance. It is destructive”

I tried very hard to rebuild my life from the bottom to the top. Perhaps, it was too late for me to change. I have spent three months unfairly. I gratified only one of my part and abandoned another one. However, at least I did not have to wait longer to change.

I changed my perspectives about happiness. I think, happiness is when I can gratified both of the parts inside me.

In the end of the semester, as usual, all of the students were gathered after the Monday ceremony. The headmaster announced the students who get the first, second, ant the third ranks. It did not even make my heart pound because I had already known that my name will not being called. I sat motionless at the back and thought that I have disappointed many people. Suddenly, one of my friend shocked me and said that the headmaster called out my name.

“I don’t feel inclined for joking” I said, but then I heard my name was called out.

“You got third rank. Congratulation man!” said my friend.

I came to the front, and was congratulated by the headmaster. Although I did not get the trophy, I felt happier than myself the last semester. There is no word ‘late’ to change.